Op-Ed Columnist: Stressed for Success?

From: Subject: Op-Ed Columnist: Stressed for Success? Date: Fri, 2 Apr 2004 17:43:40 -0500 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/related; boundary="----=_NextPart_000_0000_01C418DA.0903D600"; type="text/html" X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V6.00.2800.1165 This is a multi-part message in MIME format. ------=_NextPart_000_0000_01C418DA.0903D600 Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable Content-Location: http://www.nytimes.com/2004/03/30/opinion/30BROO.html?pagewanted=print&position= Op-Ed Columnist: Stressed for Success?

March 30, 2004

OP-ED COLUMNIST =

Stressed for Success?

By DAVID=20 BROOKS

3DM=20 any of you high school seniors are in a = panic at this=20 time of year, coping with your college acceptance or rejection = letters.=20 Since the admissions process has gone totally insane, it's worth = reminding=20 yourself that this is not a particularly important moment in your = life.=20

You are being judged according to criteria that you would never = use to=20 judge another person and which will never again be applied to you = once you=20 leave higher ed.

For example, colleges are taking a hard look at your SAT = scores. But if=20 at any moment in your later life you so much as mention your SAT = scores in=20 conversation, you will be considered a total jerk. If at age 40 = you are=20 still proud of your scores, you may want to contemplate a major = life=20 makeover.

More than anything else, colleges are taking a hard look at = your=20 grades. To achieve that marvelous G.P.A., you will have had to = demonstrate=20 excellence across a broad range of subjects: math, science, = English,=20 languages etc.

This will never be necessary again. Once you reach adulthood, = the key=20 to success will not be demonstrating teacher-pleasing competence = across=20 fields; it will be finding a few things you love, and then = committing=20 yourself passionately to them.

The traits you used getting good grades might actually hold you = back.=20 To get those high marks, while doing all the extracurricular = activities=20 colleges are also looking for, you were encouraged to develop a = prudential=20 attitude toward learning. You had to calculate which reading was = essential=20 and which was not. You could not allow yourself to be obsessed by = one=20 subject because if you did, your marks in the other subjects would = suffer.=20 You could not take outrageous risks because you might fail.

You learned to study subjects that are intrinsically boring to = you;=20 slowly, you may have stopped thinking about which subjects are = boring and=20 which exciting. You just knew that each class was a hoop you must = jump=20 through on your way to a first-class university. You learned to = thrive in=20 adult-supervised settings.

If you have done all these things and you are still an = interesting=20 person, congratulations, because the system has been trying to = whittle you=20 down into a bland, complaisant achievement machine.

But in adulthood, you'll find that a talent for regurgitating = what=20 superiors want to hear will take you only halfway up the ladder, = and then=20 you'll stop there. The people who succeed most spectacularly, on = the other=20 hand, often had low grades. They are not prudential. They venture = out and=20 thrive where there is no supervision, where there are no preset=20 requirements.

Those admissions officers may know what office you held in = school=20 government, but they can make only the vaguest surmises about what = matters, even to your worldly success: your perseverance, = imagination and=20 trustworthiness. Odds are you don't even know these things about = yourself=20 yet, and you are around you a lot more.

Even if the admissions criteria are dubious, isn't it still = really=20 important to get into a top school? I wonder. I spend a lot of = time=20 meeting with students on college campuses. If you put me in a room = with 15=20 students from any of the top 100 schools in this country and asked = me at=20 the end of an hour whether these were Harvard kids or Penn State = kids, I=20 would not be able to tell you.

There are a lot of smart, lively young people in this country, = and you=20 will find them at whatever school you go to. The students at the = really=20 elite schools may have more social confidence, but students at = less=20 prestigious schools may learn not to let their lives be guided by = other=20 people's status rules =97 a lesson that is worth the tuition all = by itself.=20

As for the quality of education, that's a matter of your = actually=20 wanting to learn and being fortunate enough to meet a professor = who=20 electrifies your interest in a subject. That can happen at any = school=20 because good teachers are spread around, too.

So remember, the letters you get over the next few weeks don't=20 determine anything. Picking a college is like picking a spouse. = You don't=20 pick the "top ranked" one, because that has no meaning. You pick = the one=20 with the personality and character that complements your own.

You may have been preparing for these letters half your life. = All I can=20 say is welcome to adulthood, land of the=20 anticlimaxes.

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